Imagine having your own room, bathroom, TV, DVD, computer and music system, set up and free of charge, for your exclusive use. Yes, please - bring it on! Adults do not have such privileges provided, at least not unless they are in jail; they have to pay for them. It is easy to understand how teenagers of today have become so over indulged. Some even have their own car; complete with an unlimited gas account, with all the freedom that necessarily results as part of such arrangements.
It is debatable whether such grown up responsibilities should be inflicted upon a teenager. The more you give them, the more they have to maintain and care for, the more pressure on their lifestyle. It is hard enough to cope with all the unpleasant side effects of adolescence, such as pimples, awkwardness, puppy fat, and dozens of other insecurities; is it really advisable to add more complications?
Car Tvs And Dvd Players
Some of the happier, better adjusted teenagers I have come across are those who live away from cities, in a simple environment, where peer pressure is almost non existent and modern day gadgets are in short supply.
Another case is that of a fifteen year old teenager who must provide daily care for her sick father. This outstanding young lady cheerfully sacrifices just about all of her social life and divides her time between providing care and assistance for her father and catching up lost homework in the little spare time she has to herself. Her nature is such that she never complains about not having so many of the accessories of teenage life. She has never owned a TV or DVD player of her own, she has a limited supply of fashionable clothes which she treasures and she would be amused if she knew that many parents would consider her underprivileged.
In contrast I have seen nineteen year olds throw childish fits because their parents will not buy them the latest iPod technology or pay for yet another ticket to see Rock Vomit in concert. It appears that parenting techniques which include showering your teenager with every modern convenience come dangerously close to inflicting real and lasting damage on your child.
The question is where is this magical line we must all take care not to overstep? Is the secret merely to withhold that last little treat so that your teenager is aware that some things are worth waiting for? Should privileges be earned and not given as routine?
The evidence is clear that teenagers do not require an array of gadgets to enjoy a successful adolescence. Nor do they need unlimited access to the keys of the Jaguar. What they all really need and what so few of them ever get is gentle, affectionate but strict parental involvement.